What do you say to someone who just lost her son to suicide?
Nothing. You listen.
And when she can’t talk because she’s staring off into space in utter shock you just sit with her. You silently stroke her hair.
You quietly pray to God in your helplessness that He’d comfort her somehow. Because only He can do the impossible.
Don’t ask her what she wants to eat. Even the littlest of questions are too overwhelming. Just set a small plate of fruit and crackers next to her. Keep a bottled water next to her, too.
Don’t tell her you understand. Don’t tell her you can imagine how she feels. She can’t even imagine how she feels. It’s the most sickening day of her life. There are no human words to describe this – just groans. The reality of living the rest of her life without her son is simply too much to bear physically, emotionally. It’s incomprehensible.
Make sure someone is with her at all times for the first several days. The temptation to be with her son may be strong.
It may take months or even years… But in time her grief will begin to turn into useful sadness.
Hang in there with her for the long haul. She needs you.